The 80+ Best Stage Jokes

why did the orphan become a stripper? so she could have someone to call daddy

A blind comedian was asked to do stand up for a hospital. No one laughed at his jokes, so he continued to sing, "If you're happy and you know it..."

The room was full of arm amputees.

I do t get why cancer is so hard to beat. I’m already on stage 4

Is it still stand up comedy if the comedian doesn’t have legs

public speaking is a more popular fear then snakes and you don't see anyone walking in australia and shout look out a podium

I was a sit down comedian then i try to stand up I felled

I wished i stayed in the wheelchair.

I was in Russia listening to a stand-up comedian making fun of Putin. The jokes weren't that good, but I liked the execution.

The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spen the rest of their lives trying to forget it.

Yo Mama so thin, when she signed up to be a stripper she became the pole

There was once a spanish magician, he said," Uno,, Dos..." and he dissapppeared without a tres

"So you dropped my instruments on stage?" "It was only the Bass!"

The Pope and Donald Trump are on stage in front of a huge crowd.

The Pope leaned towards Trump and said, “Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!"

Trump replies, “I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!”

So the Pope slapped him.